Breaking the Silence of Abuse

Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Offer encouragement

You cannot force other people to do the right thing. What you can do, and what is extremely effective, is to encourage them.

If you offer threats, intimidation and low expectations, you’ll get resentment and poor performance. When you assume and expect the worst of others, you’re very likely to get it.

A better choice is to expect the best, and to offer opportunities for those expectations to be met. Though it’s true that people won’t always live up to your positive expectations, it’s also true that most people would prefer to do what’s best for everyone concerned.

Just about everyone responds positively to positive, genuine encouragement. Let others know, clearly, precisely and in positive terms, what you expect, and let them know you have faith that they’ll meet those expectations.

Instead of looking for ways to control, look for opportunities to support and encourage. Instead of conducting detached transactions, seek to build ongoing relationships.

Offer the encouragement to do what is right, what is good, what is valuable and positive. Expect the best, in a supportive way, and it is much more likely to happen.

— Ralph Marston
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Making hope real

It’s good to hope for the best. Yet it’s infinitely more effective to put your thoughts, actions, commitment and genuine love into actually bringing about the best in life.

Hoping, wishing and dreaming can be very positive experiences. It is important to remember, though, that such experiences are starting points, not ultimate destinations.

You can very realistically experience what you hope for. The way to do so is to go beyond mere hope, and to put your life into making that hope real.

Hope can matter very much, and have an extremely positive impact. The way to make it matter is to do something about it.

Give time, effort and substance to your hope, to your dreams, wishes and visions for life. If something is important enough to hope for, it is absolutely important enough to work for.

Experience how good it can be to feel the hope. Then experience how very much better it feels when you put your life into making the hope real.

— Ralph Marston
Monday, December 16, 2013
Better than ever

If you’re in a pattern that’s taking you nowhere, it’s time to create a new pattern. That’s not nearly as difficult as it might initially sound.

You are the person who is keeping yourself stuck in an unproductive pattern. You are the person who can move quickly, decisively and permanently to something much better.

Stop and take an honest, objective look at what you’re doing. If you had a good friend who was doing the same kinds of things, think of the advice you would give that friend.

One big reason you keep doing what doesn’t work is because it feels comfortable. So remind yourself that continuing in a negative, unproductive and unfulfilling pattern will make you extremely uncomfortable in the long run.

Comfort feels nice, and yet fulfillment and meaningful achievement feel thousands of times better. Your life is meant to be filled with the richness of new experiences, not just the comfort of familiar routines.

Get yourself out of that same old pattern and get yourself on a path that will resonate with your passion. You owe it to yourself, and to all of life, to continue becoming better than ever.

— Ralph Marston
Saturday, December 14, 2013
Unwelcome interruptions

You have great plans, and yet life is always getting in the way. You intensely wish to move forward, but all sorts of things seem to constantly interrupt and impede that movement.

But do those unexpected and unwelcome interruptions really have to hold you back? The fact is, you don’t have to let them.

Sure, you must regularly deal with the urgent, pressing matters that come your way. But that doesn’t mean those unwelcome interruptions have to take over your life.

Instead of seeing those interruptions as negative, distracting influences, you can just as realistically choose to see them as positive, empowering opportunities. Just because they weren’t in your plans doesn’t mean they have to upset your plans.

Decide that there’s something positive to be found, and you’ll find something positive in anything. Decide that the interruptions won’t really interrupt you, but will in fact provide you with additional ways to move forward, and that’s exactly what will happen.

Learn to welcome, embrace and empower yourself with the unexpected interruptions. They’re always going to come, so make the choice to make them work in your favor.

— Ralph Marston
Friday, December 13, 2013
Clear direction

Decide where you will go, and then go there. When you live by intention, there is no limit to the rich rewards that life can bring.

To get somewhere, you must first know precisely where that is. To achieve, you must zero in on the specific details of your intended achievement.

Whether it is for an hour, a day, a month, five years or five decades, clear and purposeful direction makes a profound difference. The highest level of fulfillment comes to those who can envision precisely what that fulfillment looks like.

Yes, it’s difficult to hone your scattered ideas and desires into a positive, coherent direction. Yet you most certainly can do it, and each time you do the results will be amazing.

Give yourself a clear direction for this day, for this week, for this beautiful and unique life of yours. Give yourself a clear direction and you’ll have a workable path to your own special greatness.

In whatever you’re doing, choose a direction that will express your highest, most treasured values. Give yourself a direction, and give your very best gifts to life.

— Ralph Marston

Thursday, December 12, 2013
Give care

If all you care about is what’s in it for you, there won’t be much in it for you. If all you care about is what other people think of you, people won’t think very highly of you.

What you care about has a powerful impact on the way your life unfolds. So instead of caring so much about what you think you need, put your energy into caring for all that you have.

You have life, and great possibilities, and other people with whom to enjoy it all. You have a universe filled with beauty and wonder, and the opportunity to create new meaning and value.

Give loving care, attention, gratitude and support to the abundance with which your world is filled. Take good care of the good things, and they will grow even more beneficial.

Give care, focused thought, attention and awareness to whatever you’re doing, and whatever you’re doing will bring meaningful, valuable results. Give your care to making a difference, and continually put that care into action.

Lift up life by caring for it. Give true care, and the rewards are immense.

— Ralph Marston

Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Think highly of yourself

Very often, your biggest limitations are the limitations you put on yourself. What you expect has a profound effect on what you actually get.

If you think of yourself as too old, too inexperienced, uninformed, dull or ordinary, those negative expectations influence the way you live. When you think of yourself as creative, passionate, interesting, valuable, unique and genuine, those positive expectations will be expressed in your life.

Thinking highly of yourself doesn’t mean you have to be arrogant or elitist. When you truly think highly of yourself, you’ll end up living your life so as to genuinely prove those thoughts accurate.

You can be held back by your expectations, or encouraged forward by your expectations. Make the choice to be encouraged, inspired, motivated and compelled by the positive things you expect of yourself.

Sure, there are many difficult challenges you’ll face in living a fulfilled, successful life. Don’t add your own negative expectations to those challenges.

Instead, expect the best of yourself in every moment and in every situation. And ride those expectations forward to a life of true fulfillment.

— Ralph Marston

Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Do yourself a big favor

You don’t have to beg or wish or hope for favors from others. You can do yourself a big favor today.

You can use the moments of this day, the moments available to you right now, to create value. You can choose to take the specific actions that will bring new, meaningful richness to your world.

Even though you may be burdened with challenges, obligations, limitations, frustrations and other factors pushing against you, still you can move forward. You can choose to achieve something valuable in spite of whatever might be working against you.

What really matters is not your situation, but your attitude, your intentions and your commitment to make positive things happen. When you’re truly committed to making progress, you will find a way.

Reach into your most sincere, authentic self and connect with what matters most to you. Have the courage to admit what you love, and to do something about it.

Do yourself a big favor and live this day with purpose, intention, passion and relentless energy. You can do it, and you’ll feel amazing when you do.

— Ralph Marston

Monday, December 9, 2013
Start the ball rolling

Motivation leads to action, and action leads to more motivation. If you’re not motivated to do anything, do a little something anyway and start the ball rolling.

Even the smallest positive step can begin to create positive momentum. Take that small step, feel the tiny wisp of motivation and momentum, and let it carry you to the next modest step.

Even if it doesn’t seem to accomplish anything, a small, initial positive action does in fact achieve something of great consequence. It gets you going.

Once you’re in motion, you’re much more likely to stay in motion. The longer you stay in motion, the more likely you are to keep going.

The best thing to do when you don’t feel like doing anything, is to do something. Remind yourself that although you may be severely unmotivated, you can take a small action anyway.

No matter what your situation or level of motivation may be, there’s some little something you can do. Do it now, get the ball rolling, and let the power of positive momentum push you forward.

— Ralph Marston

Saturday, December 7, 2013
Who to blame

When a law has been broken or a contract violated, it is important to determine who is to blame. For most other things in life, however, being concerned about blame is largely a waste of time and effort.

Yes, it matters who is to blame. Yet there are plenty of other things that matter much, much more.

Punishing those who are to blame does not undo what they have done. Time and effort put into assigning blame take time and effort away from moving forward.

Let go of the need to blame. Embrace the freedom and the opportunity that forgiveness can bring.

It is better to make new progress than it is to fight battles from the past. Instead of becoming obsessed about who is to blame, become passionate about the good things you can now do.

Your best options are found by looking forward, not back. Make the choice to make the best of what has happened, starting now.

— Ralph Marston

Friday, December 6, 2013
Live smart

Don’t just think about how great life can be. Live those thoughts.

In your own unique way, you are incredibly smart. So use the opportunity of this day to live smart.

Your best ideas deserve much more than to be stuck in your mind. Bring those ideas to life.

You intuitively understand what it will take to make a positive difference in the world. So go ahead, and actually do what it takes.

Put your thinking into action and truly experience how great life can be. Translate your intelligent thoughts into effective, rewarding efforts.

You’re smart enough to know what it takes to create the fulfillment you desire. Put that great intelligence to use, today, and make it happen.

— Ralph Marston

Thursday, December 5, 2013
The moment when you can

Now is the most important time in your life, because now is the time you can do something about. Now is your most powerful moment, because now is when you can exercise the power of your intention.

Don’t waste this powerful moment complaining about the past or worrying about the future. Invest your time, this time right now, in living with purpose, passion, creativity, effectiveness and joy.

This is not a time to be timid or vengeful, angry or disappointed. This is your time to find sweet fulfillment in using your wisdom and your efforts to make a difference.

It doesn’t really matter what’s been happening lately, or whether you’ve been falling behind or speeding ahead. Now is a valuable new moment, filled with new possibilities, ready for you to live with all you have.

Now is jam-packed full of great opportunity. Grab some of that opportunity, right here, right now, and do something beautiful and meaningful with it.

You are here, this moment is here, the possibilities are here, and you can immediately start to transform those possibilities into fulfilling reality. This is the moment when you can, so do.

— Ralph Marston
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
Give purpose to this day

To get the most out of this day, give it a purpose. Instead of just taking whatever comes, experience this day the way you choose to experience it.

If this day has no clear purpose, then you’re likely to be tossed around by all the random things that happen. Yet when you’ve made a firm commitment to a specific result, your focused direction will enable you to rise above the distractions and diversions.

If you’re standing still, wondering what to do next, the obstacles will push you back. Yet when you’re already moving forward and you encounter obstacles, your momentum will help carry you through them.

Give this day a purpose that will excite you, motivate you, ignite your passion and compel you to get moving. Give yourself something good and meaningful to show for the time you spend living this day.

When the next step is clear, you’re much more likely to take it. When you’ve decided exactly what is to be done, you’re much more likely to do it.

There is enormous positive potential in this very day. Give this day a purpose, and claim some of the great value it offers.

— Ralph Marston

Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Choose a positive response

No matter what happens, you can respond in whatever way you choose. So make your response the most positive one for every person it affects.

There’s nothing to be gained by adding more negativity on top of negativity. You have the opportunity to break the pattern.

Instead of responding to anger with more anger, challenge yourself to respond with understanding and compassion. When you’re tempted to respond with frustration, make the more positive choice to respond with patience.

For your world to be a more positive place, you must take responsibility for putting more positive energy into it. Though a positive response may be the more difficult one, it is also the more valuable choice in the long run.

Rather than choosing a response based on what has happened, choose your response based on the direction you wish to go. Even when life has let you down, your best choice is a positive response that creates a more positive future.

Each response to life is an opportunity to make progress. Choose a positive response, again and again, and create a much more positive world.

— Ralph Marston

Monday, December 2, 2013
Build great strength

Don’t run from failure or hide from failure or avoid the possibility of failure. Use failure to improve.

If you’re not willing to fail, you won’t be able to grow. To become stronger and more capable, you must push yourself beyond what you already know you can do.

It is only by lifting more weight than you’ve lifted before that you strengthen your muscles. It is by experiencing failure that you discover new ways to succeed.

Failure and disappointment can serve as powerful steps along the path to magnificent achievement. In dealing with the difficult times, you build great strength with which to create good, meaningful, satisfying and fulfilling value in your world.

Success means nothing if it is not earned. Failure is an important part of earning success.

The road to achievement will constantly test you. Be willing to take those tests, and to work through those tests, and achievement is yours.

— Ralph Marston